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RITUALS AND CEREMONIES

Helping Couples Tie the Knot

by Anne Pyburn Craig

date posted: March 15, 2023

There are some religions that allow no deviations from their formal rite of marriage, but in the vast majority of cases these days, you and your love have the freedom to craft a ceremony that fits you like a pair of gloves. The right officiant for you will be someone who’s wholeheartedly on board with your plan, whether it’s classical or postmodern or even has a touch of improvisation thrown in.

If you love a ritual that has no particular connection to your own culture, but it just seems to fit you both, then consider making it your own in some special way.

Ritual ideas from a range of cultures can offer inspiration. If you love a ritual that has no particular connection to your own culture, but it just seems to fit you both, then consider making it your own in some special way. Inspiration, not flat-out appropriation, is the word here.

• A wedding knot—a fisherman’s knot that you tie together in ribbon—has Celtic roots and a deep note of universal symbolism. In handfasting, another Celtic gem, your officiant binds your hands together, perhaps with heirloom fabric.

• The African American tradition of “jumping the broom” symbolized stepping out of one’s old life and into a fresh new one together, in itself a universal concept that can be expressed without using an actual broom.

• Hindu couples exchange garlands of flowers, placing them around each other’s necks to express respect and loyal acceptance. Some cultures incorporate a “lasso,” a figure-8 that an attendant or officiant places around both of your necks at once.

Photo by Hudson Valley Elope. Ceremony by Michele Zipp.

Left: Photo by Elizabeth Austin Photography. Right: Planning by Gina Maloney Events. Photo by Qyyn Doung. Flowers by FGX Events.

• Jewish couples sign a spiritual contract called the ketubah. The signing often takes place in private, but the idea of signing your names to a contract together may resonate in a ceremony.

• From the vast Judeo-Christian tradition comes the idea of a wine ceremony, which can involve blending wines from two vessels into one cup, from which you’ll each sip. (Of course, it can be water or any other liquid of your choice.)

You and your love have the freedom to craft a ceremony that fits you like a pair of gloves.

Photo by Hudson Valley Elope. Ceremony by Michele Zipp.

Rituals that bring your family into the act are a lovely touch.

• The Cherokee practiced a blanket ritual, in which each partner is first wrapped in an individual blanket (blue was the traditional color) and they’re then wrapped, after vows are spoken, in a white blanket symbolizing peace.

• Unity flames can be candles (Judeo-Christian), or a small fire you light together (African.)

• Rituals that bring your family into the act are a lovely touch. Pass around your rings or your handfasting cord and let each person bless it with their touch. Invite your parents or closest people to come to the altar and join in group prayer, or pass you a flame with which you’ll light your unity flame.

• Place objects together into a time capsule that you’ll bury and retrieve on a distant anniversary.

• Plant a plant together as a symbol of your growth as a couple.

Photo by Clean Plate Pictures. Venue: Buttermilk Falls Inn & Spa.

 

MICHELE ZIPP CEREMONIES & rituals

Hudson Valley, NYC, 646-509-6600, michelezipp.com

Michele is a non-denominational wedding officiant who has been crafting customized ceremonies filled with love and laughter since 2011. She’s a writer and Reiki Master, so telling your love story and including spirituality is part of her life’s work. Her unique ceremonies include meaningful rituals like handfasting, blessing circles, crystal grids, Tibetan singing bowls, magical botanicals and herbs, and reiki healing, with everything personalized for each couple.

peter sonnenberg

Peter is a non-denominational/interfaith officiant providing customized wedding ceremonies that reflect the couple’s personalities, beliefs, and passions. His specialty is combining cultural and/or faith traditions, as well as incorporating unique and distinctive ritual elements to create a truly personalized and meaningful ceremony. As a spiritual director of a Westchester Holistic Healing Center, Peter has been in the field of the healing arts for over 27 years.

 

columbia tent rentals

Ghent, 518-851-9460, columbiatent.com

A full-service rental company for all occasions—from small and informal, to large and elaborate events—we provide one-stop shopping to make coordinating your event as easy as possible. Established in 1980, we are known for our personalized customer service and clean, well-maintained equipment. We take pride in assisting each couple to bring their vision to reality!

sav-on party central

Kingston, 845-336-5800, savonparty.com

Sav-On has been a local, family-owned business for over 50 years. Their 5,000-square-foot location in Kingston Plaza is a full-service rental equipment warehouse and office, allowing you to arrange for delivery of rentals and pick up of rental equipment all in one convenient location. They carry tents, tables, chairs, china, flatware, glassware, linens, and more in their rental warehouse.

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