Photo by Monika Eisenbart Photography. Planning by Main Course Events.
Pre-wedding celebrations are wonderful fun. They build the anticipation of the Big Event and let your nearest and dearest circles get to know each other, which makes for a better party in every way. Gone are the days when couples had to abide by strict rules about who hosts what and which genders are allowed to attend. Tailor all your celebrations with common sense and love as your guide, and you can’t go wrong.
ENGAGEMENT PARTY: This can be anything from a backyard cookout to white-tablecloth dining, ideally within the first few weeks of your engagement.
Throw your own or see if a sibling or parent would like to host. Consider a couple of getting-to-know-you games; they’re corny, but surprisingly fun and effective.
WEDDING SHOWER: Someone else—a relative or close friend—should host this one, consulting with you (of course!) about your preferences. Old-school, ladies-only get-togethers are still fine, but so are coed gatherings. The setting can be someone’s home, a tea shop, or your favorite pub. Gifts can be from your registry or follow a theme; maybe you’d like to have everyone give an experience (theater or sports event tickets, dinner out) or a bottle to stock your bar.
Photo by Cottonbro Studio.

BRIDESMAIDS’ (OR BRIDAL PARTY) BRUNCH: This is a great way to say thank you to the beloved friends who are on this journey with you, holding your hand, and cheering you on. It’s also a great way to build the team’s camaraderie.
BACHELOR/BACHELORETTE PARTY: If you’ve always dreamed about a blowout bash featuring a brigade of strippers, and your intended is fine with that, have at it…but do realize that it’s no longer required. Your bach party should be about unleashed fun, but that can be a spa day or a horseback riding or ziplining excursion, or a weekend at an AirBnB. Traditionally, each attendant pays their own way, so be thoughtful when it comes to the cost.
REHEARSAL DINNER: It’s handy to hold this somewhere near your ceremony venue, since you’ll all be there anyway. Besides your planner, officiant, attendants, and parents, consider inviting out-of-town family or close friends who might otherwise be at loose ends, or VIPs (Grandma? The friend who introduced you two?) Don’t forget to give attendants a plus-one.
POST-WEDDING BRUNCH: Getting together to rehash great moments and say farewells can be a wonderful way to wrap it up, especially if people are traveling. Low-key is good; everybody’s happily exhausted, and more formality is a lot to expect the next morning. Maybe your venue has a space that would work; maybe there’s a nearby coffee shop with a party room, or someone in the crew has a beautiful backyard with a pool. Keep everything simple and delicious, so you can focus on the people you love.